Kate Galli: 0:00

We are going to be in the game long term, we need to look after ourselves. And the journey though along that journey needs to be happy as well, but to be sustainable, it can't be all angsty all the time.

Philip Pape: 0:15

Welcome to the wit's end waits podcast. I'm your host, Philip pape, and this twice a week podcast is dedicated to helping you achieve physical self mastery by getting stronger. Optimizing your nutrition and upgrading your body composition will uncover science backed strategies for movement, metabolism, muscle and mindset with a skeptical eye on the fitness industry so you can look and feel your absolute best. Let's dive right in Whitson weights community Welcome to another episode of the wits and weights Podcast. Today we are hanging out with Kate galley, a health coach, author and host of the health of vacation podcast, I invited Kate on the show today to talk about taking care of the most important person in your life. And that is yourself. Changing the world requires that you have the most capable body and mind to do so in my opinion. And so you are going to learn how to master your inner dialogue, how to prioritize your health and happiness, and tailor your self care practices to fit your lifestyle. You'll also learn some practical tools to reshape your daily routine, so that it aligns with your core values and propels you toward your best self. If joy and happiness are truly important to you. Yes, Kate has extensive qualifications including being a master personal trainer for 18 years, a life coach and an NLP practitioner, which is also committed to plant based nutrition. A passion has been dedicated to for the past eight years, as a way of helping 1000s of individuals sculpt the body and life they love with the confidence to go with it. Her work is fueled by her ambitious vision, a world where fitness and compassion go hand in hand to create a fit strong, happy and healthy planet. Kate believes in the power of mindset of choosing to eat and move in a way that is sustainable and consistent with your lifestyle and values. Kate, I love your mission. And I really want to welcome you to the show.

Kate Galli: 2:07

Thank you so much Dilip and what a fabulous introduction. I appreciate it.

Philip Pape: 2:12

And you know, we connected through the podcasting world and I've been listening to your show as well. And I love the positivity that that definitely appeals to me. And I know a lot of people listen to this show look for that. They look for that, because there's a lot of negativity out there. And today we're talking about the one person maybe some of us put most of that negativity onto which was ourselves and turn that around. And we're gonna get into the topic of self care, which, as we were joking before we started recording is not always the sexiest topic, right? It's like, here are the five things to do for your health. And maybe down here at the bottom for some of those lists is managing stress and self care. So first question for you is why is self care important to you? Why should those listening pay attention as we start to explore this topic? I

Kate Galli: 2:57

think it's something that many years ago, potentially self care was naturally worked into our lifestyle, there was an end of the working week, there was time out, I think increasingly, those of us that want to live happy and healthy, and it have a positive impact on the people we love most and also the world if we have a really big vision, we need to set some boundaries and take control so far as their self care practices we have. And it's so important to me, they look probably as with most things that you really focus on, it's important because I've really struggled with it. So I've had, I guess, devise the strategies that work for me that work for my clients that will work there so many people to just incorporate these little self care practices into our every single day.

Philip Pape: 3:46

So there's two things that already struck me right deep down inside the first one, especially that you said that used to be integrated into our lifestyle. So do you mean historically, you know, pre technology, kind of if you go back 50 or 100 years, which I can imagine just tired of the idea like simplistic times those were because I'm 43. And I remember before cell phones and computers and even that I have nostalgia for like the 80s and 90s of using payphones and not having a phone with you all the time. So tell us a little more about that. Because I think that's a cool perspective, especially when Today we live in such a jazzed up, you know, connected world.

Kate Galli: 4:22

It's so true. I'm 27 I have nostalgia for the fact that before mobile phones before their computers, but boy, so much technology, that weekend was the weekend and maybe if we were small business owners back then our parents or whoever, you know, maybe they were always on but they weren't always on to the degree to which we are now and I think that is why we need to set these boundaries. And if we travel that even further, I think of my grandparents who lived on a farm and there was a constant never ending list of things to do. But at the end of the day, that list was there for tomorrow. And you continued on tomorrow. And it's almost like there wasn't the self pressure that we now keep on ourselves back then I'm sure there was lots of pressure. However, I looked back at it fondly, and go, Wow, they were pretty good times. Yeah,

Philip Pape: 5:15

it's amazing how quickly all that changes, too. Because as when I was a young engineer, this is 20 years ago, we didn't have the ability to work from home, we didn't have laptops, it was computers on a desk, and even that I could remember, the day was done, and you drive home. And it's like, one less thing. And now everything is just with you all the time. So it's good to have that awareness of the context. So hopefully, we'll get now I'm sure we're gonna get into how do we now manage our lives in that context. But the other thing you mentioned was that you personally have struggled with it, we can all relate, I can relate. being just a hustler. We're so busy, I love to I do love to work, and I love what I do for people. But you know, we need a break sometimes. And practical strategies, I think are where it's at. Because there's a lot about, there's a lot of lists online, like, you know, what, and I know you have them too, right. But yeah, but some of them are just like boilerplate, you know, do meditation, do yoga, Do this, do that. It's just a standard list of things. And I think today, we're gonna get into some more, like you said, practical things, and maybe not everything on the list is for everyone, but people can pick what works for them. So what are your thoughts on everything I just threw at you.

Kate Galli: 6:21

I completely agree. Self Care is like fitness to a degree. Obviously, it's a huge part of that. But people just want to jump in and take the actions, you know, with fitness with weight loss, tell me how to eat tell me how to train, we actually need to lay the foundation for someone's future success in fitness, health and fitness and self care is the same. It's not just the meditation, and the meal prep and the adequate sleep, it's the digging deeper, it's the mindset behind that that is going to pull you through on your struggle straight days. Because there can be struggles, straight days, just prioritizing self care in the same way that there can be getting to the gym, or whatever it may be. That's

Philip Pape: 7:01

so true. And I noticed parallels with your list. So just for the listener, we're gonna base this off list that Kate has called eight step guide to cultivating self care where self care is an acronym. It's eight things. And you know, again, we're not going to overwhelm you with a list here. But is the order that this is important, because I noticed it starts with the mindset and seems to move toward practical steps. Does that make sense? I get

Kate Galli: 7:24

what you're saying. Perhaps it just worked out, really. And then the last one is probably just a bit of fun. And I just I love an acronym for it. Fair enough. I don't know why I've got many of them. But the first one is very important. Okay, yeah,

Philip Pape: 7:37

we could just go in order and make this a natural thing. Like I'm not just going to artificially segue, let's see what we let's see what we cover. And the first one is self talk, right? Yeah, self talk. Like, what comes what strikes me is how, especially like in the food and the movement training world, people they give themselves labels, all sorts of labels all the time about who they quote, unquote, are. And sometimes it limits them from who being who they want to be or who they aspire to be. But you tell us about the importance of self talk, negative and positive self talk and where we can go from there.

Kate Galli: 8:13

So your self talk is so incredibly powerful, and if you recognize them, and first step is an awareness, right, so if you recognize you're in the habit of, I guess, negative self talk, I can't do this. This is too hard. I'm naturally fat and lazy, whatever horrific self talk you might have. Awareness is the first step. And we can change the way that we speak to ourselves, we can aim to speak to ourselves, and the way that we will speak to someone we really love, and hopefully we really love ourselves. But maybe it's easier to imagine, you know, your little sister or your mom or dad or partner. And I mean, I'll share from my personal experience. I remember a dear lady that I started training about a decade ago and this lady when she walked into the gym, she would have been in her mid 60s and we stopped training together when I left Sydney and she would have been in her mid 70s by then. And she was on the cross trainer warming up the her session with me and herself talk out loud was I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't and I was like, oh my goodness, like that was her non stop out loud. No luck. And I guess it was a matter of pointing out to her how she was making it so much harder on herself than she needed to. She was to focus instead on what she could and what she actually was doing. And bit by bit the transformation. I saw it and that lady who you know, in the end, she's still going strong without me in her 70s and back in Sydney, lifting really decent weights and one of the things I love about the gym and trying not to get too off track but is the confidence that being able to change Your strength and body in the gym by lifting weights specifically, I know you're on board with this. This is applicable to every other area of your life becoming the person who used to be I can't. And now is I can and I am that is absolutely a confidence that just is going to be reflected in other areas of your life as well.

Philip Pape: 10:23

Yes, yeah, lifting weights does build resilience, because it's just this physical, achievable objective thing, right? It's just like so concrete when you do it, I get that. And you said earlier imagining someone you love to? It's true, right? We put ourselves in a vacuum as if we're separate from other humans somehow, and yet, we're having our own conversation. So there's a few different types of self talk I want to explore. One is the type where there's a factual situation, okay. And I hear this all the time, when it comes to training, people are getting started, and they might have some pain, or they might have some limitation, or they might have some, something that can be a quote, unquote, potential excuse, right for, for taking that next step. How do we deal with that scenario, first and foremost, because that sometimes is a big roadblock to people getting started on health and fitness, right? Like, oh, I have painful shoulders, therefore, I don't lift weights, therefore, I'm not going to go to the gym. But how do we deal with that type of self talk.

Kate Galli: 11:17

And then again, I would start small and manageable and focus on what you can do. Because always there is something you can do. It's the same way. I mean, obviously, you'd see a professional if you had a particular injury, but often we have these little niggles that prevent us from doing certain things. And so again, choose your focus and focus on where you can do, and that's going to be so much more productive.

Philip Pape: 11:44

Yeah. 100%. So just if somebody's asking you a question, the listener is listening, and your immediate response is, oh, I just can't do that. Or I feel this. And therefore I can't ask yourself, What's the alternative? What can you do? Yeah, I love that.

Kate Galli: 11:57

So you know, tough, tough love Kate would also say, and I had a dear coaching friend ask this to me talk about love Kate would say, so how's that working for you? That current mindset that you are choosing? How effective and even more so How fun is that? That whole? I can't it's too hard, not me. It's just not fun or effective. And I am all about fun and effective and health and fitness.

Philip Pape: 12:23

Love it fun and effective. And I put efficient to in that effective 100%. Like saving time. And yeah, what I mean, when it comes to food and fitness people do that all the time. Are you restricting what you eat? Or are you nourishing your body? Right? Are you punishing yourself? Because the gym just quote unquote, sucks? Or is it? I'm looking forward to, you know, challenging myself because I'm able to grow my strength and muscle or whatever, right? So Landreth, has said, love that. Alright, so if we continue to thinking of ourselves in our mindset, and getting in our head, part of that self talk, and that self identity also has to do with maybe where we've been and where we're going and our values or systems, our beliefs, right, and I think your second step is actually elicit your values and beliefs. So how do we I guess the first question is, how do we even identify those because some people probably don't even think about them. This is an element of self awareness, you talked about self awareness, and then we can align them. So how do we first identify those? Yeah,

Kate Galli: 13:19

I love this. So it's elicit your values and beliefs and use them as a daily filter in your decision making. And this is going to aid in your self care. And for our listeners, you have your values of those most important states that you're drawn to. So if you haven't yet elicited them, think of where you spend your time, your energy, your money, not what you hope you would prioritize, but what you honestly do prioritize. So I mean, personally, example, my top values of freedom, and integrity. And they work really well with health and fitness. Because personally, I see the the ability to be able to rock around in a fit, strong, healthy body that I feel confident about. I see that as freedom. And as a personal trainer for 18 years, so far is integrity. If I am not walking the talk, I have zero integrity. So that is super compelling, the way it might not work. And the way we might need to change it is imagine that your number one value is something along the lines of love or connection or family. And that's an amazing value. However, imagine you had a weight loss goal, and the actions you needed to take to achieve that goal. You know, maybe you admit that maybe that's getting to the gym or going for a walk or some sort of workout early in the morning. If in your mind, you are seeing that action you need to take to achieve your goal. If you're seeing that as in conflict with spending time with your family, the people you love most. It's going to be a constant battle. You're going to be finding yourself to take that worthy action and get the gym and get the results. You don't need to change your values. You don't need to change your goal. You just need to Have reframe them to a way that is more congruent and supportive. So whatever you saw that thing that that strong, healthy version of you allows you to live a long fulfilled life with your family, it allows you to be the most positive role model for your family. That is the way that goes, that value is going to support the attainment of your goal rather than being in conflict with it.

Philip Pape: 15:25

That that, that speaks to me in the in the food department, especially when, right when people say like this, this particular style of eating, and I'm sure this this resonates with you as well is I'm being told this is the right thing to do, right or this, this is good or bad, or it ends up being a moral choice. Like it's strange, this cognitive dissonance that you're talking about. And somehow we think that there's the sacrifice we just have to make, right? We just have to make that sacrifice when what you're saying is something doesn't feel right. It's not aligning with what I believe in some way. And somebody has to change. Now, you said reframing, is that reframing then the catalyst for finding a different action to take, you know, a different way to take that action? Because I like going to the gym, you said which is kind of that's a generic thing, right? So we want to get more specific, could somebody's values be in conflict with going to the gym? Or is it gets in conflict with what goes into the gym gets them right? And the reason they're going to the gym? That's what you're, you're saying, right? Yeah,

Kate Galli: 16:26

I mean, you have to be it to a degree, like you want to think had on your values and make sure they really are your true values, right. And I didn't dig in all that much with the eliciting, but maybe you come up with as many of these emotional states as you can possibly think of there are hundreds of them from from truth and love. And can the listener brainstorm as many as you possibly can, and then narrow it down to your top five, and then order them by priority to make sure that we really are dealing with what, what really those emotional states that you really do seek out and should be a way to align them congruently with the actions you need to take, I'm trying to think of somewhere where it wouldn't be congruent. And in my mind, I'm just a way that you couldn't reframe it. And in my mind, I'm just thinking it's some sort of a negative value or incongruent value to start with. That's what I'm coming up.

Philip Pape: 17:23

Makes sense. The premise is flawed, and yeah, we'll go back to the values always come back to those. Yeah, that makes sense. Because you said what, you know, what do you prioritize now? What do you hope to prioritize? Yeah, yeah. And the brainstorming, that's pretty cool. It reminds me of a survey in positive psychology called the via survey. Have you heard of this? Oh, I haven't. So me, okay, the VA, it's free, you can take it online, I think it's associated with a book called authentic happiness. And you take the survey takes like 20 minutes, it's a lot of questions. And it tells you your top strengths. But to me the strength and it's only strengths, its weaknesses is just strengths. It's positive focus. And they appear to be like values, like there's compassion and optimism. And there's probably freedom and honesty and things like that on there. Just thinking if I'm a very like, left brain type thinker, so when I, maybe that self talk, it's okay, I embrace it. It's working for you. It's okay. I embrace it. And so I like to have structure around some of this stuff. So if people are looking for a way to brainstorm, that's one that came to my mind, when you talk about brainstorming, is there other tools that you use specifically? Or is this just kind of a freeform thing that you do? Let's

Kate Galli: 18:34

say much, it's probably fee free form. However, if someone was struggling, if they really didn't know what their values might be, I would look to someone who they respect to someone and mentor someone to potentially model you don't even need to know this person, everyone makes themselves so available online, and try and I guess, elicit what their values might be looked at. If this is a person leading a life with the health or whatever you're looking to attain for yourself. If they're leading the life that you're looking to lead, maybe try and imagine what they make time for and what they don't make time for and potentially what their top values are, that could be a starting point, again, needs to feel congruent with you. And if you're really stuck, it's good to look at the people who are where you want to be. Yeah, that

Philip Pape: 19:20

makes a lot of sense and it's consistent with what we were talking about self talk kind of going outside yourself because we do get stuck in like we're this you know unique special person but as if we are not connected to the rest of humanity and really there's so many role models out there for us potentially. So I love that. Do you want to share with the third one is because you know what they are? Or I can okay no

Kate Galli: 19:43

of course of course. And they are sounding as it like almost cutting by order of importance. So owl and self care is to lock and load the big rocks that keep you happy and healthy. So call them big rocks or Keystone Habits or whatever it is. Most of us have in our idea of the things that when we do them with feeling our best, mentally, physically and also happiness wise, because happiness is so important. So your big rocks, they might be adequate sleep, they might be exercise, I hope they are, they might be planning your meals, some sort of mindfulness, it might be meditation, it might be journaling, it might be self reflection, whatever it is that you need in your week, my recommendation is to schedule them to lock and load them as non negotiable habits. So that basically they don't get nudged out at the mercy of all those little pebbles, all those little urgent, less important things that can just tend to jump into our week. That's,

Philip Pape: 20:46

that's one of the best piece of advice, honestly, that I think people can hear is the scheduling part. I mean, seriously, what are the what are the excuses I hear all the time is I don't have time, right? And I'm sure you hear it as well, I don't have time for XYZ. And yeah, there's limited time in the day, it's 24 hours. So there, you're not, you don't have more, and you don't have less you have 24 hours, it's not like you have, but the question is where are you putting that time. So I know personally, sleep has always been something that I have to pay more attention to and schedule and more. Because, you know, for me, it's like, you're squeezed in right by the day. For others, it might be like you said exercise or training because they're just, you know, they don't want to get up at five in the morning or whatever the reason is their excuses. And maybe they want to do it in the afternoon or something like that. What would you say are the big of the top two or three, you mentioned the pillars themselves, like sleep exercise planning, but when you work with people or clients, or whoever the top ones that come up all the time where people struggle to do that, and it's not just a matter of hey, go schedule it, there's there's some extra step that's taken to really make sure that happens. What would you say,

Kate Galli: 21:50

the things that people struggle with is definitely any sort of planning around their nutrition. And you know, and that doesn't actually have to be meal prep every single week, I used to for hours every week, and I don't mind it, I'd listen to a podcast while I was doing it. However, it might just be finding out once off those go to really quick and effective recipes that you love the taste of you might not need to meal prep them every week, however, you might need to work out that, hey, this is the quick thing I tend to based on what's on the fridge and what's in the fridge and freezer and pantry. When I get home late and my discipline tank is empty, and I'm absolutely starving. This is my quick go to that I know how to make or when I'm out and about this is what I know to buy or whatever it is definitely, definitely nutrition is the thing that people struggle with. And so far is making it work. You know, when I am massive on structure, maybe even to a boat I very much it helps me be efficient and effective. But I'm not very good at and prompt you. And one of my dear friends used to always call me the planner, and I'm like, well works for me. If our listeners are struggling with the thought of too much structure, again, I kind of Rephaim frame it to structure is freedom because you've got all the things that are priority structured into your week, so that you're going to get the results that you're seeking. But also you've got the free time structured, because if you don't bother planning or structuring anything, then all the hours in your day hours that you should language or pressure be doing something. Whereas if I've got all my hours structured for what I need to do, then all those other hours are free their mind out unscheduled. Oh

Philip Pape: 23:35

man, this is so good. You're hitting out of the park Kate, I love all of this. I definitely empathize with the structure piece, but also the freedom of it. And like food logging, food tracking, right. A lot of my clients will do that early on to kind of understand the quantities and the macros and micronutrients, even if I don't care what the target is, I just want them to be aware. And all of a sudden, sometimes when people start documenting things, or like you said scheduling things, they realize that it takes away the fatigue of the decision making it takes away the emotion. Right and you said impromptu and to me that's one of the most stressful things is to imagine having a black hole of possible decisions. And now if anything that makes me highly inefficient because now I have this hour and I'm like what do I do during this trip? It's funny, you won't know we know know what we're talking about. And then you talked about the recipes. So I have a a woman on my team who is the the recipe person like she loves fancy recipes and meal planning and all that and I just That's not me. I like I like mix and match. Like 10 foods, give me 10 or 15 foods in my whole kitchen. Others mix, mix and match them all week and I'm happy right? But one thing did come to mind when you're seeing all that is tying it into your positive reframing earlier. Make it fun, right like whatever works for you and aligns with your values. I bought a ninja creamy finally you know what that is? Right?

Kate Galli: 24:59

I no bullet or something like a blender thingy.

Philip Pape: 25:03

It is specifically to make ice cream.

Kate Galli: 25:05

Oh, hilarious. I thought it might be like No.

Philip Pape: 25:09

It specifically for ice cream it has like the blade comes down slowly into a frozen mixture that you've made the night before. So that's okay. Yeah, and I love ice cream. And I joke about it all the time on the show. Because anytime we talk about like the foods you enjoy, and like, you know, you don't have to restrict, I always bring up ice cream. And to me, it's so much fun to get this thing and figure out new recipes for it and make, you know, 300 Calorie peanut butter cup ice cream for a whole pint, that would have been like four times the calories, you know, and I thought it. So things like that can can go a long way. I'm just just having fun rolling with it here. Okay, so Lock and load the big rocks that keep you happy and healthy, which means prioritize the things that are really important and make them non negotiable and schedule them into your week. Love it. The fourth one filter the people you spend time with. And this

Kate Galli: 25:59

works so far is the people you maybe want to spend a little bit less time with, but also the people you want to spend more time with. So we all know those conversations or those catch ups where we come back, and we are absolutely exhausted. And we're Why did we even do this? And obviously we don't have complete control over maybe the people we work with maybe some of our family members, we do have some control. And again, this just comes back to awareness and thinking, How did I feel after that interaction? Is it really worth it? Can I spend less time with this person? And at least as importantly, you know, those catch ups that you come back from and you're on such a high maybe you're so motivated to get into the business or whatever it may be, you're just on a high after spending time with that person? How can you spend more time with that individual and this count star online as well. It relates to the type of podcasts you listen to, you know, from time to time, I'll go down a true crime rabbit hole. And maybe that's good, that distraction, but it's really not the quality fuel that I want to be feeding my mind. But there's limitless people that our listeners can and ourselves can spend time with by a podcast or online, that they actually feel really positive after that time that they didn't test it. And, and so that's what that steps about. Yeah,

Philip Pape: 27:26

so filter, you're right filtering people where you're with and without, because we do some talk about, okay, get rid of toxic people in your life and this and that. But you're talking about also seeking out the positive, kind of like when nutrition you know, we add in things that serve us and are positive and it tends to crowd out, you just don't necessarily have the energy aerospace for those other people you mentioned, you know, we might make excuses that we don't have control over it. But yet, we can. And this is self talk and self reframing. I was thinking about how people who started working from home during the pandemic, you know, some people loved it, some people hated it, whatever. Some people started going back to work and saying, on both sides of the equation. So people are like, well, now I'm around all these people that are that are bothering me all day, and I don't you know, they're negative energy. And so I'm just gonna work from home. But anyway, jokes aside people who give you a high, not just physically who you interact with, but like you said, the information you get. And so I'm thinking I used to be a big news junkie, the Cable News Network. And when I it's like a drug when you cut it off, right? You go through withdrawal at first, as you like, what's going on in the world. And then you realize how liberating it is not to have all that negative information? Oh,

Kate Galli: 28:36

sure. I'm like, drama happens naturally enough in our life anyway, why would we seek out more drama, and even drama that doesn't even relate to us? Why would we do that? It's just it's a waste of energy and joy. It is.

Philip Pape: 28:49

Yeah. And the podcasting, too, I would say, definitely gotta listen to Kate's podcast. Keep listening to this one and follow it if you're new to get that positive spin because that's that's what we like. And I joked before we started recording that occasion, we'll have someone on where we might have some disagreements in certain small areas, but they're insignificant in the context of like, I don't want to be a new show where it's like talking heads fighting against each other and having debates. I know, there's people in the fitness space who love that, and they call people out and they have the debates. That's not me. I don't know what you think, Kate, but that to me is another way you can filter. You know who you surround yourself with. The

Unknown: 29:28

most value that I got from this was the fact that I had someone that I could talk to about anything and that there was going to be no judgement. It was just Well, here are your goals, here's the best way that you're going to achieve it. And then let's work together to help you feel inspired and motivated to do that. And a lot of people out there trying to be coaches and not all of them have done the work and also just be a genuine person that is positive and coming from the heart in turn. wanting to help and Philip really embody all of those qualities, I would recommend him to just about anyone that's looking to achieve goals in that realm of their nutrition and building new habits.

Kate Galli: 30:13

I respect that I love your approach, it's something I aspire to even more as well, because when push comes to shove, it's about what's effective. And it 99.9% of the time, I'm not going to say something so impactful that you, you change some tightly held identity, belief or value in the moment, it's just gonna create conflict. It's not I don't enjoy listening to it as a listener. And I think just plant little seeds over time and be the person live the lifestyle, rather than telling and judging and you know, anyone that follows me, it's an ongoing lesson for me as well. However, I respect the people that do it well, and you do it well. So appreciate it.

Philip Pape: 31:00

Yeah, and I feel for the situation you're in as well. You know, for people listening, check out the Health Education podcast, because Kate's plant based and she, she lives by her values, right? And you guys know, I'm an omnivore. And that's, we're just different in that sense. And that's fine. And one of our recent episodes was about, you know, how to positively interact with people who don't agree with you, I mean, effectively to that, what I don't know how long ago that episode was about was going through your feed. It's a lot of them, ya know, there's a lot of them. And when you're in a, in a very small minority, which I imagine, still to this day, at least in the Western world, kind of pleased eating is in a small minority. Now, if you live in India, it's kind of the flip because I remember visit India, it's like, you had to seek out the meat, you know, the opposite. But anyway, we're in the minority. And we can extend that to a lot of what we do for our health or our values, right? When you think of fitness and lifting weights, how many people really lift weights, it's a tiny percentage people. And so having that small see that pushes out of positivity and values is important without letting the kind of silly controversies override that I don't know. That's what I think

Kate Galli: 32:05

it absolutely relates to health and fitness, and also to politics not to go there. But if anyone is listening, and they have conflict with someone that they love, maybe the person they met love most in the world. And the thing you care about most that are that person that you love just doesn't get it. Like it relates to so many things. And the thing that I'm learning is to lead with love and compassion. And so far is the food deliciousness as well. Maybe labor deliciousness food breakfast, right. But that the judgment and the anger, it just I tried that it doesn't work.

Philip Pape: 32:41

Yeah, everyone has some value in something that they can say. And where I was going with that is, I just recently heard someone I follow a long time on a podcast mentioned a fact about themselves that I had no idea and I wouldn't have not listened to them because of it. But it wouldn't necessarily be associated with someone that I always associate with, right. And I realized after years of following this person and agree with 99.99% of what they say, then that that's that I agree with most of what they say that I should value that, you know, the value is still there and say no, we're not going to agree on everything. So yeah, it comes down to. So all right, so we got a little bit philosophical, but I do think that's important in the context of filtering people, which was number four. So okay, we can keep going on keep on that topic, because now we get into a little more of the, I'll say, some of the practical side of the list that you unintentionally put in the second half.

Kate Galli: 33:36

So C is to create a not to do list, you're not to do lists precedes your to do list, you know, we're all overwhelmed, we've all got more than you know, we think we can handle. And in terms of buying yourself some time that not to do list is just a first very practical step. And again, I think the things that maybe you resent, or maybe you're doing them out of habits, and they're not as efficient and effective. They're just something that you keep doing, or they're just something that you've really dreads nailed down on that not to do list because that's gonna give you more time for the weights and the meal prep and the time with the people you love that are more impactful and more fun.

Philip Pape: 34:25

So this not to do lists, is it you mentioned things you resent, which I imagine is a great first place to start. Is there then a priority beyond that? Because I could imagine you have things you present and things you kind of resent and things you maybe just don't like and kind of move your way down. Is that how

Kate Galli: 34:39

you would do? You were adults, there are some things that we resent, but we need to do because they get us out. They give us results or because they're really important to someone we really love. So it's a weighing up, isn't it like it's not a perfect world and we're all going to have to do some of those things that we don't love all that much. However, again, it's Just an awareness of what is within your control, I talk about overwhelm a lot. And I think overwhelm is scattered, lazy thinking, it's focusing on everything that there is that you need to do. And that could go wrong with a special focus on what is not within your control. So I'm just advising that we really narrow that focus only to what is within our control, and then, you know, get actionable with it. And again, I like the acronyms. I like the alliteration. When we're looking at everything that is on our list. I like ditch delegate, do some things, you can just ditch right off your list, they're not high value, some things we can delegate, which is amazing. And then there's always the next do. And

Philip Pape: 35:48

these all tie in with some of the other things you told us about scheduling things in and 100%. And I also want to ask you like, is there a reframing step in there? Because when, when you talk about things we resent, maybe we think we resent it. And it's actually something that serves us serves our well being, even if it's not, like you said, doing it for someone else, or someone we love, even if it's for ourselves, should we be reframed, because I could see people saying, All right, well, I resent going to the gym, so I'm going to cut that out next. Well,

Kate Galli: 36:15

again, you know, how's that working for you? And also, I look at the people who I really respect, and the people that I really respect, who are maybe really successful and really kind and impactful. They don't lead easy, comfortable lives. We're not we're looking to like have fun and joy and happiness and abundance. However, I think it would be jam boring if we were just cruising along, in super comfortable, never evolving, never stretching ourselves, never having challenges. So there is value in as long as there's value in that thing that you resent, or it's a little bit unpin. And it's probably okay to stay on the list.

Philip Pape: 36:55

Yes. Do your squats. I don't care how tough they are. Yeah, that's on that list for me is just do them. Yeah. And if your legs don't seem to be responding, they will. Okay. So you're kind of like a stoic at heart, right? Because you talked about stoics. There you go. I could tell right, you're talking about doing things in your control, not worrying about the rest. But also we want to challenge and grow. And don't make it easy. But I think the love comes from it not being easy and getting through it. So you are your true stoic at heart.

Kate Galli: 37:24

I appreciate that. Yeah, there's so much to learn from him. Yeah.

Philip Pape: 37:29

All right. So I guess this is a pretty straightforward one, creating the not to do list, having those boundaries, say no to tasks that interfere with your goals. One other thing comes to mind. It was an exercise I did years ago, in like a career counseling sessions, I was with a counselor helping me with my job. And we did a matrix, four boxes. And on one one line was what you liked versus what you didn't like. And it was what you were good at versus not good at. Maybe there's some labeling there. But you get the idea, right? And I remember putting in one of the boxes, I am good at making PowerPoint slides, but I don't like it. And the counselor said, Well, do you do that often in your job. And I said, like 90% of the time my boss is asking me to make slides because I'm good at it. And I just don't like it. She says, Well, there's our opportunity to kind of see see what kind of change we can make. So it just reminded me of that of if you have a structure or some way to identify those things, go for it, jump in and see what kind of insights it gives you. 100%

Kate Galli: 38:28

And I'm sure that wasn't the most high value use of your time. You might have been good at it. But I think he probably could have done more high value things better. For

Philip Pape: 38:36

sure. For sure. I was very young at the time and like kind of shy and introverted. Yeah, if you can imagine. Yeah. All right. So moving on to the next one. A, you want to tell me what it is at 24

Kate Galli: 38:49

hour digital detox. So I did this for a while and it was soot that impactful and full transparency, I need to welcome it back into my life. 24 hours might be too much. There's some of us it was a good place to start than me. And again, it was about setting those boundaries with the modern life that we now live. We're always on and maybe not just in a work sense. I think of teenagers and the fact that they're always on in relation to social media and communication and it just feels overwhelming, actually. So I recommend choosing the period of time that works for you. I used to go say 4pm on a Saturday and no devices like the phone for plans but not the scrolling or email before pm Saturday to 4pm Sunday. And the freedom in that knowing that that was me time. Yes, I could catch up with brands, but I wasn't doing brand am scrolling and being inflamed by it and I wasn't checking emails and it was just a non negotiable, scheduled free period of time is something I really, really recommend to myself again as well

Philip Pape: 40:04

in the world didn't like burn down around you.

Kate Galli: 40:07

That is a really good learning for your ego as well the world doesn't stop maybe have to be a tiny bit more prepared but even if you're not the world doesn't stop you're fine.

Philip Pape: 40:19

It's it's like the Europeans right often take I don't know if this is the case in Australia but very long vacations like the four and six week long vacations. And there's a joke, at least in the US we use the out of office replies so liberally that even if you're out for like a half day, it's like, I'm out this afternoon, you know, I'll be back tomorrow. And in Europe, they're like, I'm on vacation by you know, it, dog. So exactly the detox, would you say that there's a, I guess it's if we want to have it stack or whatever the term might be time it with something where you'd be better off not using the device Anyway, time or

Kate Galli: 40:59

a week, you know, this is my dedicated family time, friend time, whatever it is uninterrupted, they're gonna really respect and appreciate that, when you're not on your device. That's what I'd recommend. Yeah, not not your first working day of the week, that's not going to be so effective.

Philip Pape: 41:15

Yeah, and I can imagine the other value of this is not not just for yourself in a vacuum. But also, if others are doing it with you, you can have deeper communication. And it's kind of like when the power goes out those fun times when the power goes out, and you just have candles, and no TV or anything. You're just sitting there like, Alright, I guess we're actually gonna talk.

Kate Galli: 41:33

Yeah, 100%. And this is one of the many examples where the self care that you prioritize for yourself, has a super can potentially have a super positive impact on the lives of the people around you as well. You can be that positive influence, right?

Philip Pape: 41:49

Yeah. I'm just thinking through like, my I always, these interviews are great, because they're always coaching sessions for me too, because I asked what the listeners trying to learn. And then I'm thinking how I can constantly improve my own life. Yeah, as a result of it. What there's a, there's a Netflix show, so it was a digital, that's very popular right now called Love is blind. I think they're like in season eight, or whatever. And my wife wanted to try watching it and it's very dry. It's very much drama. Okay. But the way it works is people are, are in these pods where they can talk to each other, and they can't see each other. And they have no devices for like a week. Oh, so they have no devices. And they have to, quote unquote, date with someone they can't see. By just talking to them.

Kate Galli: 42:33

Right. Are they put together so they can turn off?

Philip Pape: 42:37

pods with a wall? Okay. Yeah, so the love is blind, they supposed to fall in love with that emotional connection. And then they pick who they want to marry. It's crazy, right? It's drama. But you know, you do see it kind of reminded that, like, we just don't do that very often at all. Just sit and talk.

Kate Galli: 42:56

100% Yeah, yeah.

Philip Pape: 42:59

And so for those out there with with spouses, and you're busy and everything, I mean, just think about your own life. And even if there's a even if there's a daily 30 minute digital detox that could that could be helpful besides the 24 hours. So

Kate Galli: 43:12

yeah, that's true. And if you pick the time, if it's dinner time, like Sacred Family dinners, fine, that could be very impactful.

Philip Pape: 43:19

For sure. See, I'm just thinking do what works for you, right? Like, if you can't do the 24 hours, get 30 minutes, and then work your way up. 100%. All right, then number seven, tell us what that one is. This

Kate Galli: 43:29

is probably this is one of my favorite, this is really realistic expectations for yourself and for the people you love. So often. And again, it comes back to the self talk and expectations, sometimes we set the bar so high for ourselves, that it might even just be too hard to even try, right. And so often just lowering the bar to raise our chances of success just being a little bit more realistic with our expectations for ourselves. And also, this has been such a massive ongoing learning for me. If mentioned, I'm plant based I am I'm an ethical animal rights activist, vegan as well. And my father is pretty much the anti vegan. And you know, it's been a big learning on how to manage a relationship with someone you really love when their value seems so vastly different to your own. And again, I had to have the house that working with for your conversation with myself when I was just angry and sad and frustrated all the time. And so wherever it is in your life, it could just be that you started a new healthier lifestyle, and the person you live with isn't on what they see as a health kick. They're like, Yeah, I'll just wait till that falls to the side and we go back to our normal habits and they're still bringing junk food into the house and, you know, you've got to focus on doing what's right for you while also having realistic expectations for that person you love, bearing in mind the relationship that you want to maintain and continue with them, if that's important to you, and it is to me, and to do your very best to meet that person where they are, rather than judging them in terms of, you know, they have the same information I have, and they're not making the same decision. Well, that might be right. However, they haven't read the same lives, they don't have the same values and beliefs and goals and life experiences. So they're coming from a really different place. And it's kind of naive and ignorant of ourselves of me to jump those high expectations that I might have put myself on them when they're working towards something, someone else. So for me for my and the reason it relates to self care, is when I wasn't practicing that, as I said, I was sad and angry and frustrated all the time. That is not how I

Philip Pape: 45:57

want to live. Yeah, you took this in a direction I didn't even expect because what I you mentioned realistic expectations of yourself, but then the people you love Yeah, I thought that I think that's beautiful, because and it ties into what we were talking about earlier, where you're not going to agree on everything. And you effectively said that information doesn't equal context, right? Like, information is just facts out there. And yet, they're in a vacuum. And we as human beings have tons of context. And so like you said, even even if two people will eat the same dietary pattern, and they do have the same values in that sense, they have a different body size, they have a different, you know, training age, they have different, they might be different just demographics, different health issues, and so on. It goes on and on. And it becomes like a infinite set of possible differences. Yeah, so if there's an infinite set of differences, the only way you're going to agree with somebody 100% as if every infinite thing is the same. And that's impossible, right? Never happened. Never happened. So therefore, logically, like you said, Be the stoic. Don't worry about the things you can control and control the things you can. You also mentioned comments that people make about, like you said, anti vegan, that's interesting. So you're vegan, and I, and you deal with somebody who's vehemently against that as what you're saying, right? Pretty much. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Because that's tough, right? Because a lot of us will have people who just passively disagree, but like, what you're saying is they outwardly like, judge you for it. One of my clients in her checking the other day said, she went to a dinner, and they had all this great food. And one of the person said to her, you're probably going to eat something really healthy, or you're probably only gonna eat those vegetables, they get this, this judgment, judgment shining through. And the funny thing is, she's really fit and takes care of herself, but she eats almost anything she wants, because she's done it in a way that allows her to do that. And so it was, it was kind of a just a funny thing, that people put their own insecurities on us, let's be honest, they kind of wish they were there and haven't taken those steps yet. And so they're projecting, I imagine, to some extent, and so you know, the expectations you just can't have having as high as, as we think we might, is what you're saying,

Kate Galli: 48:07

it comes back to the compassion and empathy, you know, that the person making the comment about her food was obviously feeling insecure about where she was at with her own health. And she was maybe feeling some judgment, even if it wasn't there. And the same with the loved ones in my life, they maybe have a fear that maybe there are some lifestyle changes that they could and should make, and they just don't want to go there. And so again, if we bring ourselves back to the love and compassion for that person, it just helps me be more calmer in an interaction. And again, that comes back to what's effective, rather than necessarily what is right I can be many times, I'm pretty black and white on what is right. Definitely what's aligned with my values and delights in ethics. However, what's right often isn't effective in the moment right now. So that's something I constantly have to remind myself of, as well. Yeah,

Philip Pape: 49:05

pragmatism has its place for sure. You will we have a 10 and 1212 year old and one of the challenging things that comes up a lot lately is white lies and like the value like if it's is it ever okay to tell wildlife? You know, occasionally they understand that white lies people will say, but it's it's in the context of being pragmatic and not hurling, it's hurting somebody's feelings or trying to judge someone in a little complex, ethical things like that. So it's funny, we have to be role models like that. But what would somebody say? And this is kind of a generic question, but if someone is a little bit on the attack, like somebody who just disagrees with your values all the way and says something about it, and it's somebody you want to live with, you know, maybe this is lovely woman in your life that you're going to see all the time. How can we handle that? Well, what is something someone can say or how can they react in that moment? Do you think that energy

Kate Galli: 49:55

you bring to the conversation is most important and when I first became vegan around Eight years ago, I did the animal rights activism on the street holding up the videos of the slaughterhouse footage and all of that for a number of years. And what amazed me is it didn't matter. I actually can't even think of any situations where this didn't work. When I stayed calm, and respectful, and full of compassion, it didn't matter the energy that someone approached me with the anger that they approached me with it that like sure people would walk past and say something horrific, and keep walking. The people who actually came up and wanted to have a conversation would match that energy that I wasn't putting out there. So if I was staying calm, and respectful, and if I was curious about understanding them, I wasn't like, yeah, you're wrong, this is horrific. I was like, So tell me more about that, you know, if I could get inside. And that was more fascinating as well. Like, it's really interesting to learn where someone's come coming from, how they formed their beliefs and what they've grown up with, then I happen to have the best conversations with those people. And it was amazing. And no one changed my mind. And I don't know if I changed anyone's mind. But we came away with respectful conversations. And again, they were seeds planted. And meat, they saw me as that happy, healthy, vegan, not that angry, vegan, I will say, the more you love someone, the harder this is to do. I think, and I have this conversation with people on my podcast all the time, it doesn't matter how it's certainly not about having all the facts and being persuaded persuasive in your argument, whatever you're arguing for. It's certainly not about that, I think there's an additional block and dairy out when someone is a relative, or someone you really love. And you probably have years, perhaps decades of history, and maybe they see you as the way that you were when you were 16, or whatever it is, it just takes a patience. And I guess a willingness to I kind of go for the low hanging fruit, right, and he had a coach and support the people who are open to it. And that's my heart, I love that. I'm not here to convince the people who aren't yet open to it. And sadly, that might be the people I love most, you know, what I do want to do is maintain a relationship with them. And to do that effectively, we need to again, focus on what we have in common. So that's something I really look to do. So

Philip Pape: 52:25

stay calm and respectful. I love it. It's it's, again, I think of my daughters of like when they were young, and you want to discipline them. And sometimes the best way to do that is just be the calm person, you know, don't be fighting. And adults. Adults respond to that just as well. Thanks. Hey, yeah. Yeah, being curious. I love that. And maybe, maybe you will, because you're not trying to convince people, but maybe people will respect you more in having that attitude that, hey, you are more civil and open minded. And therefore I'm open to listening. And some of that by osmosis may come into their brain over time.

Kate Galli: 52:59

You know, it's a it's a long game. And this comes back to self care, whatever we care most about in the world. It's not going to change overnight. I wish it would, it won't. However, if we are going to be in the game long term, we need to look after ourselves. And the journey though, along that journey needs to be happy as well. Great to be sustainable. It can't be steel this time. I'm

Philip Pape: 53:23

all for happiness. So I agree. Okay, we have there's one more and I know, are you do you have a few extra minutes past the hour today? Oh, yeah,

Kate Galli: 53:30

I'm good. Okay. I just want to make sure yeah, um, so a in self care is that easy, quick fixes. And, you know, again, this one just that fitted in well, and some of that other self care steps, there's a bit of digging deep, it's laying laying the foundation for your future success as we started with, there's a serious amount of work involved. However, the results pay off long term and sustainably. Sometimes you just want an easy quick fix, you know, it's like, Alright, let's do let's call a friend. Let's listen to a good song. Let's do a five minute workout. Let's go for a walk around the block or sit and let the sun hit our face for five minutes. Something really simple, low barrier to entry that you can do at any time of the day where you just feel a bit overwhelmed or a bit under the pump or just like you need a little bit of time for you.

Philip Pape: 54:21

I love it. So this podcast with you wouldn't be a quick fix, although it's refreshing for me today to talk to you. But what would be an example of I mean, there's I'm sure there's a million but like the most popular ones, if somebody is maybe stressed, they're going about their day might be working might be doing something, what can they jump in and do what are your favorites? I'm

Kate Galli: 54:39

a massive fan of nature, or even just sign if you can duck outside and do a walk around the block and if it's sunny, like absolutely amazing. Nature's it to me however for some people, it might be personal connection. So if you can make a phone call or fire up a few messages to people you love, and throughout the day, their replies are going to come back Whatever most resonates with you.

Philip Pape: 55:02

Great. Yeah. And again, it's it's based on your values. And I'm looking at a sunny day here. And I know it's about 7am where you are. And so it's the afternoon here, but because of the time change, it's still it's light later now.

Kate Galli: 55:14

Yeah,

Philip Pape: 55:15

gotta get out after this podcast, you inspire me go out and get some sun. Me too. All right. I mean, I'm sure we could come up with all sorts of these, these micro habits and these quick fixes and which I love that one. Because sometimes we use quick fixes a negative like, well, we don't do quick fixes with our weight loss. We don't do quick fixes here. But sometimes that's exactly what you need when it's just, you know, efficient and effective in the short term.

Kate Galli: 55:37

True, you're not always going to be the most stoic, disciplined, perfect version of you. We're working towards that. But sometimes you're just like, yeah, give me the quick fix.

Philip Pape: 55:46

Yeah, go do some jumping jacks. All right. So all right. So I do like to ask this of all guests, Kay. And that is, is there any question that you wished I had asked? And what is your answer?

Kate Galli: 55:56

One of the questions I love is the advice you would give to your younger self. And if I think of debilitating Lee shy, Kate of her teenage years before I got into the gym, or if I think of Kate, in her early 20s, who was full of false confidence, the advice I would give her and to many of our listeners is to back yourself 100% Potentially now more than ever, nothing certain you don't know what's coming up today, tomorrow, next month, next year, you can't have certainty and circumstances. And often sadly, you can't have certainty and other people, you can cultivate a certainty in yourself in knowing that you will come through for you. You are the type of person that you can trust. And so I call that to back yourself. 100% and that is what I wish younger May and many teenagers, you

Philip Pape: 56:51

back yourself 100% Because it's the only thing you could have certainty in. And you are the type of person you can trust. Love it. Awesome. Thank you, Kate. This has been a blast. I mean, the time flew by I was actually surprised when I looked at the clock because I'm having a great time. But I hope you enjoyed yourself. And also, people want to know how to reach you. This was fantastic. Where can listeners learn more about you and your work?

Kate Galli: 57:11

Best place is strong buddy green planet.com That you will find their health application podcast over 860 episodes deep via that also the plant positive journal that I broke last year. So yeah, Strong Body Green Planet across the socials. That is the best place to find me. And Phillip, this has been so much fun. I love your attitude and energy. You are so calm. I'm sure that's why your listeners keep coming back. And it's been an absolute blast. So thank you.

Philip Pape: 57:42

Thank you so much yet I learned a ton from today. And I hope the listeners will realize that self care is potentially the most important thing that we have as a foundation, everything else if you can focus on this, all the other stuff just becomes easier and part of your life. So thank you so much for coming on. Kate.

Kate Galli: 57:58

Amazing.

Philip Pape: 57:59

Thank you for tuning in to another episode of wit's end weights. If you found value in today's episode, and know someone else who's looking to level up their wits or weights. Please take a moment to share this episode with them. And make sure to hit the Follow button in your podcast platform right now to catch the next episode. Until then, stay strong.